Some things need no improvement or enhancement. The smell of a newborn baby’s head. The feel of a warm fire on your back after being out in the cold. The smile on a loved one’s face when they open the perfect gift that you picked out for them. Bacon.
Everybody loves bacon! Religious observances aside, my brother has a theory that everybody loves bacon, and if you say you don’t, you’re just saying that you don’t, because you think you shouldn’t, but you really do, and you shouldn’t lie. Got all that?
Don’t mess with bacon!
I know it’s trendy to mess with it.
Bacon ice cream.
Bacon on a stick
Chocolate dipped bacon roses (no, really)
And this monstrosity from Foolproof:
The bottom of the photo shows the “caramelized” bacon, and the top of the photo shows the unadulterated, pure, unadorned bacon, as God intended. We picked at the caramelized version, but it was just trying too hard. It was like someone scooped out the insides of a pecan pie and slopped it on some bacon. Pecan pie? Good. Bacon? Great. Together? No.
Not only did the taste not impress, it was visually terrifying (TM Susan), and it would have been a really sloppy appetizer. If you absolutely cannot resist messing with bacon, just wrap a half-piece of bacon around a pitted date, and prop the little package up on a foil-covered baking sheet, and bake until the bacon is cooked. It’s much more visually appealing … and tastier. But I recommend just leaving it alone and enjoying it for it is.
We had the rest of the good (plain) bacon with pancakes and eggs for brinner (breakfast for dinner), a favorite at our house. I took a whole chicken out of the freezer a full 72 hours in advance, but it was still solid as a rock when I went to cook it. So, brinner wins. Bacon wins.